ohhsofragile

i see all these girls. dressed in their punk riddled clothes. holes perfectly put in jeans in just that spot. i wonder. do they know they look too put together to be anything other than a punk-wanna-be fashion disaster?

i sit here. alone. in silence. listening to the house move and breathe it's night sounds. gentle snores reach me from white bedsheets. i wish i was there too. snuggled in softness and gentle caresses of night. i miss the even candidness of you breathing. night sounds. so quiet. empty. alone. i crave the company of the wind touching my face. of the fresh grass wet with dew tickling my bare toes. i miss the silent dance i swung in circles. i miss the fact of solitude and star shines the night brings. so fresh. so pure. the greatness of silence enfolds me in warm arms and fluttery kisses... the echoing goodbye of winter speaks louder i

11/8/04 i can't find you. where are you? speak to me. i hear your whispers but you're hidden in shadows. deep. dark. empty corners. i squint. trying to see you. but i cannot reach through those veils of darkness. oh, please. don't cry. don't be sad. i'm trying to reach you. here inside me. know me. see me. i am all that is left. of you. these soft whispers of memories and emotions. not to be forgotten. i am real! i am here! please don't forget me. leave me. forsake me. LOVE ME! GOD JUST LOVE ME! i will not stop. looking. searching. breathing. being. even if you want me to.